Purify?

Dear Family,

I have often talked about my group of friends, called the Chunk. We are a gathering of Church of the Brethren folks, with a passion for experiencing new and exciting adventures. We have ridden across Kansas and Ohio, together. We have slept in vans, while on ski trips, together. And though i missed the opportunity, the Chunk traversed Europe and Mt. Kilimanjaro, together. Any of our expeditions would have been memorable, but what made them beautiful, unforgettable, and legendary is that we did this together.

And it is this way with any adventure or journey. If we go somewhere, a lone, it is only a trip. But we, on the other hand, we travel with companions, friends, or family, then it becomes an adventure of note. Without others around us, journeying with us, any trip we take is simply colorless and a caveat to a mundane life. We need people around us to make life beautiful. Colorful. Godly.

In our chapter for this week, God reveals Himself, again, to Jacob. And God, again, renames Jacob. But this time, its different. Jacob is not alone. Jacob's entire gathering surrounds him as God renames, not only Jacob, but all of them. God's true intentions shine brightly. We were created to be in community with each other. We are our best, when we share space, ideas, dreams, failures, pain, and death with one another. We are our worst when we leave people to fend for themselves.

And Jacob's household, now known as Israel, is on their own journey, an adventure, really. They are going back to Bethel, where Jacob's story really began. In truth, their adventure is less a trip of enjoyment, as it is a pilgrimage of discovering: who they are, and who God is. But before they can begin this journey, they must, like all of us who are pilgrims, purge themselves of what makes them impure. They must purify themselves. So they bury all the "gods" who keep the people chained to a past. They must break free from these chains, so that their new journey, their new adventure, and yes their new identity, as Israel, can emerge.

It is our story as well. We cannot become what new creation God has in mind for us if: A. we do not go together. If we choose to be lone rangers and not act, in one accord, as the Body of Christ, we will not know our true and most blessed identity. And B. If we do not purge ourselves, purify ourselves, from a past that chains us to haunted memories, we will never become, fully, what God created us to be.

We fear the new creation, because in order to be created anew, something of our identity must also die. There cannot be new until the old has passed away. It is natural to not only fear but to grieve this evolution, but it is also essential and necessary for us to go through, if we are to become the Phoenix that rises from the ashes. And we will be ok.

How do i know? Israel became a great people with a rich history, one that all of human history finds its Genesis. How do i know? The stone was rolled away, death is not the final word, only a chapter, a door that must be traveled through. How do i know? I remember little of my solitary trips, on my bicycle, but i can't and wont forget the memories that we created as a group of cyclists traversing the Kansas landscape. We can and will become something new, together. Something wonderful. Something legendary. And my heart swells with joy knowing that we have exciting chapters yet to write, together. Amen.

Shalom,
jerry

The cycle continues

Family,

I dont know where to begin. This is a difficult chapter. In truth, it is a disturbing chapter that speaks to the reality of how many women are viewed in our world, still, today. In the narrative, Dinah, the daughter of Jacob, is raped by the prince of the land. As we read the text, it seems that only the brothers of Dinah were offended by the rape, but mainly because of how they felt it made them look. Jacob doesn't even seem angered by the beast who stole his daughter's innocence. This is an abomination.

And the sad reality is that even today, many women are raped, only to hide it in the deepest, darkest caverns of their mind, because of the shame that accompanies this violent act against them. When a woman does bring it to light, then it becomes, with a defense lawyers help, an act of character assissination to destroy the woman, who was victimized, so that the violent offender can walk away. If we can paint the image of the woman as someone who sleeps around, gets drunk, wears sultry clothing, or acts like she wants it, then there is no rape. Even if she said no.

We have transferred guilt and shame from the person who is responsible, the rapist, to the victim, the innocent, the raped. This is a sad statement for our culture. More than that, when the church jumps on board and marks the victim as "guilty" then we, too, stand guilty, and may God have mercy on us.

I wish i could say that the church is immune to rape, but it isn't. Women who attend church are raped. Church goers violate others through the act of rape. And many, many times the church has turned its eyes, blindly, to the crime. Why? To protect some innane sense of who we are. It is as if we ignore it, then it will go away. One problem. It wont. When not brought to the surface, the crime victimizes over and over and over again. So how do we respond? What is our responsibility when a woman, and most cases are women, comes to us and claims she was raped? What is our duty?

First and foremost to make sure she feels safe. We listen. We offer a woman's shelter. We affirm that she is not to blame, no matter what is said about her, she is NOT to blame for what happened TO her. Then we begin to help her find resources to begin the long, painful journey of healing. We need to encourage her to report the crime to the police, and let them investigate. We are to walk with her, every step of the journey.

We are not to seek revenge. We are not to promise retribution. We are not to ask any stupid questions like, "What were you doing at that party?" "Why were you wearing that outfit?" We must support her and let the police work through the investigation. We are to be a loving, caring, nurturing community that shelters her, in one way or another, from this ever happening again.

What if she is someone we know very well, our niece, our friend, our daughter? We, again, must not seek revenge. Why? Because if we learn nothing else from Jacob's sons, it has to be this. If you live by the sword, no matter what causes you to use it, you will die by the sword. Violence only begets more violence. The cycle must stop. Now. When we choose healing instead of revenge, we actually put the focus on the victim, instead of putting the attention on ourselves in a veiled attempt to sound nobel. Our violent actions speak more to our own insecurity and lack of faith than it does about our love for the victim.

Love never leaves the victim. Love walks with her through the journey. And love sits back and listens and weeps and promises to do all it takes to help her get better. Love doesn't seek to hurt anyone else. Love shows up, always. How do we deal with our anger, our pain, our sense of shame and guilt that comes with experiencing such an evil? We get help ourselves. I did. And it worked. We find someone to talk to. We speak about our anger and shame and guilt. We own up to our feelings of rage and need for revenge, so that the other person can help us work through it.

We cannot seek revenge. It only opens the door to a downward spiral where all parties are blind, deaf, or dead. And God cannot be glorified in this way. I dont have a lot of answers, and i realize this is probably a hard blog to follow, coherently, but i wrote from my heart and my feelings, and these can't always be put together in a linear thought. Oh yeah, one more thing, when/if this happens, we are faced with the pain of rape, in any level, we had better pray for God's strength. Cause we will need it. And His strength is perfect. Amen.

shalom,
jerry

Esau's Revenge

Folks,
I know this is a day late, and some of you might be a little irritated that it didnt come out yesterday, but i just let it slip my mind. I got busy doing other things, and i simply forgot to do it. It happens, right? Am i the only one who forgets to do things? I hope not.

Anyway. So this Esau guy in Genesis 33 is a different kind of person. 20 years, before his reunion with Jacob, Esau was ready to kill his brother, who had stolen the blessing and birthright from him. For us, in 2010, this may seem like a trivial thing to quibble about, let alone fight or murder, but for the people in that time, the blessing and birthright carried so much. The inheritance. The right to choose where the family would go. The family, all the siblings, would work for the son who owned the birthright and blessing. And the patriarch even had the authority to choose the religion of the family. This was no small thing that Jacob stole. It was the very right, of Esau, to carve out a new chapter for his family, but Jacob swindled it away.

Fast forward 20 years, and we have this amazing scene. Yes he brought 400 soldiers with him, but i wonder if it wasn't just to offer protection for Jacob. Esau didn't have any intentions, from the reading at least, to do anything but embrace and love and welcome Jacob, his conniving, manipulative brother, back into the family. It was a sign of grace, acceptance, forgiveness, and above all, love. Godly love.

For any and all of you, i hope, this story should mirror a parable Jesus tells: the prodigal son. In the parable Jesus tells it to paint a picture of God's amazing love and forgiveness. Above all things, according to the parable, God rejoices when one sinner repents and returns home. Not only does God rejoice, but God wipes away the past, showers the repentant one with jewels of love, and lavishes the person with a robe of royalty: God's own child. We read the prodigal as a mirror into the soul of God, knowing that God truly is this good.

The parable is a teaching, a metaphor of God's love. It doesn't have to be a true story or real events. It is a teaching moment. So we can associate ourselves with a myriad of characters in the story. But in the narrative of Jacob and Esau, if we claim the Scriptures to be true, we have to believe this is an actual event, a real, historical experience. Not a teaching of God's amazing love and forgiveness. Not a teaching of repentance and trust. No. This is a true story with real people. And how does it go down? How does it unfold?

Esau forgives Jacob. Jacob cant understand it. No one would? Right? I mean if we had done someone the wrongs that Jacob afflicted to Esau, we would expect retribution and revenge. Why? Justice demands it. Right? Jacob expects Esau's wrath. But what he gets, instead, is Esau's love, acceptance, mercy, grace, and forgiveness. I believe this disarms Jacob so much, he probably had to spend some time processing Esau's godly actions.

And that's the power of being godly. When we choose God's way, which is the way of the father in the prodigal, the way of Esau in Genesis 33, when we choose God's way, we disarm those who have afflicted us. We remove their power over us. We choose the way of peace. We choose the way of love. And we choose the way of forgiveness. These choices empower us to be free. Free from the pain. Free from the wrong. And free to be who God created us to be, without the chains of anger, resentment, or revenge.

Esau's actions released Esau from the past. More than that, it empowered him to be free from Jacob's thieving ways. And God wants the same for all of us. If someone has wronged us, being alive it has happened, then God wants us to forgive and forget. Move on. Find peace in being who God created us to be. And let God work through what justice must be for those who have wronged us. When that happens, we find peace, true peace, in ourselves and in our world. Amen.

Shalom, Salaam, Peace,
jerry

Jacob the earliest grappler

Family,

My freshman year, in high school, i was wrestling in the Junior National Tournament in Iowa. I was a small guy, weighing barely one hundred pounds, and i had to in the 98 pound bracket. I did ok in Greco-Roman, coming within a match of placing in the top eight, but then Freestyle started. My first match was against a kid from Wisconsin, who had placed fourth in Greco. I won. I was wrestling great. I was getting close to placing, in the top eight, one match away. I found myself across from some huge 98 pounder from the state of Washington.

The match was going ok. I was losing, but it was close. I had to take him down, and if i could, i sensed i could turn him and win. I shot in. He reached around to tilt me, but i swiveled my hips, trying to counter. He picked me up; i swiveled harder, and he couldn't hold me. He dropped me. From about three feet in the air, straight onto my head. I can attest, from personal experience, that pile drivers hurt, a lot.

Before i could even breathe, i was surrounded by medics and doctors and trainers, making sure i could move my fingers and toes, because there was a tingling sensation in all my extremities. They wheeled me out on a gurney, and i spent the better part of the night in the hospital. That would not be the end of my journey. I would then spend the next six to eight weeks receiving physical therapy, shock therapy, and intense stretching, hoping my neck would recover by the start of wrestling season. It did. But one minor issue, even today.

I have a lot of pain, in my neck, on days where it is cold or weather changes, suddenly. For the rest of my life, no matter how much therapy i have had, that one match will affect me.

That's how it is with God, isn't it? When we, like Jacob, have the audacity to "wrestle" with God. God changes us, forever. We will walk with a limp. We will have the memory of that experience. And, just as the small group talked about on Sunday, we will be humbled at the opportunity to be so intimate, so close, so immersed in God that it will change our world, completely.

But something has to change in order for us to wrestle with God. We have to have the courage to not let go of Him. We have to quit hiding our heads in shame when we make mistakes. We have to admit our failures and imperfections, so that God can come, touch us, heal us, and change us. We can't model Jacob's actions, prior to the Divine wrestling match. We have to mirror his actions during and after. When we do, like Jacob, God gives us a new name. Son. Daughter. Saint. Apostle. Disciple. Beloved.

Amen..

Shalom,
jerry