Names.... again?

Dear family,

I have been wrestling with something a few years now, and i have even vocalized it a few times with you all, but i dont think i do a very good job of communicating what my struggle is. From my brain to my mouth, a lot gets lost in translation? Or maybe from my mouth to everyone's ears? Somehow something gets lost, and i still have this nagging feeling in my gut about our church family. We aren't truly a family, a community of Jesus Freaks.

And that, sisters and brothers, worries me.

Because the health of the church depends on our being a truly connected, interdependent community of brothers and sisters. That being said, though, my sense is that we dont understand what that means, truly means. And i dont know why. Is it because i dont explain the core elements of community? Is it because you are all tired of hearing my hot air, so when i speak its like that boring teacher in school that everyone hated, but loved going to because it meant you could sleep? Or is it something else?

I ask these questions, because even though we have had a vision and mission statement for the last five years, and we have transitioned our leadership style to a more team oriented model, i still think, as a church, we suffer from an identity crises. And this concerns me.


More than anything, what troubles me, is how quickly i find myself doing what i find as destructive to the community. Gossip will kill a community, and yet i do it. Side taking is a quick way to create dysfunction, and i do that too. Maybe we do these things in our homes, in our families of origin, but those situations may suffer from this behavior, but the family systems will survive, because we are all committed to our families of origin. But our church family, the West Milton Church of the Brethren, thats a different story.

Why are we willing to sacrifice our church family, or our role in that family, but we will go out of our way to restore, rescue, and protect our family of origin. Folks, you, my church family, have been our only family for six years, and yet i wonder who else feels this way? Who else wants our church family to be healthier, and more vibrant than our family of origin? If you do, like i do, than it takes recreating our identity. We must live, authentically, the name of the West Milton Church of the Brethren family. We have to be tied to each other. We have to work together. We have to spend time with one another. And when we do, when we genuinely care and live for each other, than the world will see something unique in us, and the world will run to us.

But we have to be together, and i dont know how that happens. I really dont. I know i haven't helped by taking sides and joining in the gossip. I havent helped by allowing the gossip. And i havent helped by sitting back, choosing comfort over right. And for my own complicity in not being above and beyond the gossip and side taking, i beg your forgiveness, but i also ask you to pray for me. Pray that i quit and risk losing it all to do what is right. Pray that we all do that. Because until we are ready to risk it all, for Christ and His church, we will continue seeing our numbers decline and our fears heightened... so pray with me. Create with me a new identity for our church. And lets jump into the world of mission, together. Amen.

Shalom.. and May God's Shalom overwhelm us..
jerry